My father-in-law hates me because of my tribe
Q: My father-in-law does not like me. I am from a different tribe and he tells my husband that he should have looked for a wife from his own community. He drinks a lot and one day he really made noise at me in front of family members just because I had said he is drunk. I was so embarrassed. I told my hubby to stop him and he didn't. He told me to cool down and we had a heated argument. His father sees me as an intruder. My hubby and I love each other but I feel very uncomfortable in this marriage. My husband doesn't seem to understand what am going through.
A: You came into the marriage through your husband and it is crucial that you involve him while dealing with your father-in-law. The good thing is that he is aware of how your father-in-law treats you. Create a conducive environment and discuss how disappointed you are with the lack of respect. Let your husband know that it is important for the two of you to display a united front when you are around your father-in-law. It was wrong to disagree with your hubby in front of his father as it only creates an opening to rip at your relationship.
You are stamping his assertions that you are not a good wife for his son. Face your father-in-law with your hubby accompanied probably by a family mediator and let him know that you do not appreciate his rudeness. While this may escalate the conflict, it is important because it will stem out the open disrespect.
Also addressing the issue directly may let him know you are not backing down. In the future when you are out in public with your in-law, try to keep a healthy amount of distance between you. This may have you sitting at the opposite end, but it is necessary for you to keep your cool. One of the most important things to remember is that you may not control your father-in-law's actions but you can keep your chin up. You will then live with no regrets. BY DAILY NATION

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